Oshkosh, WI (WRT) – Despite today being one of the best Super Bowl parties in recent memory, the household cat has only been described as “an ungrateful little shit.”
“Literally he has been sleeping this whole time, I have no clue why he’d miss this” complained one family member as the cat readjusted his face on the coffee table. “If he hadn’t moved just now, he might as well just be dead.”
The sleeping cat has continuously ignored most, if not all of the family members. We couldn’t obtain an interview with anybody who had seen the cat awake. “I don’t think we should invite him back next year” joked one younger cousin while attempting to move the comatose cat into a nearby closet.
At press time, there was no indication about whether or not the cat had plans to at least say goodbye to visitors later tonight.