The party started just over six hours ago after several neighborhood youths released the tapirs from the South Bend Zoo, and the wavy good-time chill-vibes have been bringing in artists of all kinds.

The festival features cutting edge bands like 4 Tapirs Looking for Ants in a Parking Lot at the Old National Bank, who started their set over 5 hours ago and continue playing even now. Many of the festivals attendees have been confused and unprepared for the sudden explosion of culture and music. Some of the more entrepreneurial attendees have been using the festival as a way to sell unique 35 Hungry Tapirs Rummaging Around the Greater South Bend Metropolitan Area merchandise.

“I’ve got everything,” said Woke Lenny, “I’ve got anthill hats, tapir milk, tapir bones, anthill bones, I’ve got the original wire cutters used to break into the zoo, autographed by the founders of this great festival.” Woke Lenny made over nine dollars today and plans on making even more in days to come.

But not everyone is pleased with the way this festival is turning out.

“This music festival has to stop,” said Officer Tad Crowley. “I’ve just been arresting tapir after tapir. I’m not even sure what for. Is there a book on tapir law that somebody can lend to the South Bend police department?” Officer Crowley proceeded to handcuff a tapir to a streetlight.

The post UNBELIEVABLE – Is This the Most Important Music Festival on Earth? first appeared on World Report Today.

Previous theories about which god, or what kind of god Kanye West might be, were struck down late last night during a series of tweets where West stated “i am actual god, the trials of my life are just #Inspiration #Yeezus”

Kanye West’s series of tweets, or now known as The Commandments, will be etched into government monuments across the nation in response to his follow up decry “Governments will teach about me in every school so kids KNOW.”

Flash drives will also be embedded in the stone that will be placed at the end of the new Commandments at each respective monument. Their purpose is not yet definite, but the tweet “buy my music on tidal 99 CENT downloaDs now for real #Yeezus” indicates the flash drives will feature 99 cent downloads of prominent religious West hymns for the poor.

At press time, God was seen tweeting President Barack Obama asking for the Presidency.

The post Kanye West Reveals He Is God After Ruining Music For Last Ten Years first appeared on World Report Today.

The post Poll: If the Beatles Released a New Song Right Now, Would You Be Impressed Yet? You Broken, Jaded, Locust of Pop Culture first appeared on World Report Today.