“It’s a supply and demand thing,” James spoke to WRT reporters, “The supply is money. The demand is money. If I control the supply of money, I don’t have to demand money anymore.” James wadded up three thousand Monopoly dollars. “Here, baby. Keep up the hard work. I’ll put you up in a hotel on North Carolina.”

At this moment, James’ children, Jessica and Donovan, have yet to comment.

The post The Game Has Changed: This Father Discovered a Way to Cheat at Monopoly first appeared on World Report Today.

“I came straight here, I’m the hungriest American there is right now, and I have the record to prove it” O’Malley said to a bewildered Denny’s cashier, confused why he was talking so loudly as the only other person in the building besides the chef. Unaware she was about to serve the recent drop out of the Democratic Presidential race, she asked O’Malley whether or not he voted in the Iowa caucus.

“Did I vote in the Iowa caucus? DID I VOTE IN THE IOWA CAUCUS? I’ve never needed a Grand Slam so badly in my life.” O’Malley said visibly frustrated while aggressively loosening his tie.

At press time, O’Malley could be seen stabbing what was left of his Grand Slam meal with a fork and staring through his booth’s window into a nearby yard with a visible “Hillary Clinton For President” sign.

The post O’Malley Goes to Denny’s After Dropping Out of Presidential Race, “I’ve never needed a Grand Slam so badly in my life” first appeared on World Report Today.