The candidate was in town for a fundraiser when airport officials had to spend the entire afternoon attempting the calm the 757 down after the unexpected interaction. The 757 was seen flaring its own tail wing and driving backward in a sideways pattern (attempting to look larger) to the safety of a nearby hanger after sighting the President’s plane.

Crews trying to lure the 757 out with jet fuel and other treats resulted in a simple mean stare from the plane itself, sparking a standoff that lasted hours.

The 757 didn’t warm up to airport crews until the plane itself felt lonely enough to seek attention. The airport has recommended that in the future the two planes shouldn’t be put in the same airport with one another.

The post Trump’s 757 Spooked by Larger Air Force One first appeared on World Report Today.

Willie Wilson who hasn’t had enough support throughout the primary process to even be invited to democratic debates, and only now has gotten on the ballot in South Carolina just days prior to the vote, apparently is still not drawing the eye of supporters in the face of Wonka’s campaign now eclipsing his own. Wilson, who is supportive of canceling outstanding student loan debt and focusing on education initiatives, just wasn’t likable enough for democrats compared to Wonka’s promise of Universal Candy.

Willy Wonka over the last few weeks has outlined his plans for a single payer candy system, where all Americans are able to subsidize their own sweets. Many also say that Wonka comes off as a “capable leader” compared to Wilson, mostly due to his much tighter foreign policy where America’s enemies would be forced to survive and eventually win Wonka’s candy factory in order to prove their ethical worth as a new ally.

Wonka himself might be doing better if it wasn’t for his extensive ties to major candy corporations and the milk-chocolate industrial complex.

The post Willie Wilson Behind Willy Wonka By 0.5% In South Carolina Primary first appeared on World Report Today.

“Hillary Clinton represents people just like you, I mean, come on, like she supports raising the minimum wage to 10 dollars an hour” he said with sweat coming off his brow. “Sanders is dividing the democratic party, do you really think-do you really think [SIC] thats? ..a good idea?”

The millennial noticing a man wearing a dark suit on the other side of the room having turned around frantically started jiggling his hand, cuffed to the underside of the table in an unsuccessful attempt to escape. After the dark suit wearing man quickly turned back the millennial froze and continued “I mean do you really think- DO YOU REALLY THINK you can just go against the establishment??”

Laughing nervously while smirking he continued “[SIC] Ha ha, hahaha, I’m-m just kidding around, t-the establishment is just some m-made up Sanders fact.”

The post Millennial Poll Officer Telling You To Vote For Hillary Clinton Seemingly Chained To Table first appeared on World Report Today.

“I only want to hear the results in the clearest format available, it would have ruined the experience completely otherwise.” Sanders said to a group of reporters in a basement at a friend’s house of his. “This was absolutely worth it, and it’s clear to me- it should be clear to everybody, that election results are not about Bernie Sanders… election results are about pristine audio quality”

At press time, the Vermont Senator could be seen in an anti-establishment discussion with his friends “who understand the real problems the United States faces today.”

The post Bernie Sanders Finally Hears New Hampshire Results After Waiting For Vinyl Release first appeared on World Report Today.